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Once I started to work in cheese — I’ve been a cheese industry girl for the past 15 years — I neglected cheese in its baked-into-a-cracker form. At this point, I was only eating cheese and crackers (or cheese and no crackers!). It was having kids that reminded me about the joy of cheese crackers. When I tasted my first Goldfish after a decades-long hiatus on a playdate with my then-toddler daughter, my taste buds immediately snapped to happy attention.
Sure, the little fish were full of nostalgia, but they were also inarguably delicious. There was something about the intermingling of cheddar, salt, and snappy crunch. After coming back to these crackers again and again, the deliciousness hasn’t faded.
My family eats a lot of cheese crackers. If I put them in a resealable plastic bag, they’re an ideal car snack, a lunchbox staple, or a mid-afternoon pick-me-up. If I put them in a cute little bowl, they get elevated to cheese platter accompaniment — I’m a professional and I wholeheartedly support cheese on cheese! So naturally I called on them for this specific taste test.
We had a lot of fun snacking our way through a dozen options to discern the most richly cheddary, the most delightfully crispy, the most times my two year old could request “a little bit more.”
The Tasters
I assembled my family, who doubled as my trusty tasters for determining the best cheddar crackers: me, my husband, two-year-old Julius, and four-year-old Simone. We’re all serious snackers and devoted cheese lovers, so this assignment was right up our alley. My kids have strong opinions about cheesy snacks, I have more than a decade in the cheese industry, and my husband is both a cheese and cracker connoisseur, so we were more than ready to dig into our crunchy homework.
The Methodology
We used very highly scientific terms, here — mainly how much we wanted to go back for seconds, and thirds. The best cheese crackers make finishing the box a no-brainer. We decided the best cheese crackers are not subtle; they overwhelm you with that salty, savory, cheesy oomph. They make your mouth water and your hands grab for more.
My family of four (with some help from our maltipoo Ace, who cleaned up the mess) dutifully tasted, considered, and munched. We chose major brands that were available on DoorDash and boasted sharp cheddar or cheddar flavor. We rejected some from being not so cheddar-forward, having an off flavor that didn’t taste like cheese at all, or having a funny powdery flavor that didn’t adhere well to the crackers.
We recommend these five winners, and will be herein forth stocking them in our kitchen.
The Results
The Cheesiest: Better Cheddars
My friend told me this was the nostalgic brand of her 1990s childhood, but Better Cheddars’ thin, crisp disc-shaped crackers were new to me. I’m so glad they’re part of my life now. I liked the flaky, light texture, although Simone insisted it tasted “too much like paper.” The best part here is the brawny cheddar bite, savory and umami-rich. Serious yum.
The Most Satisfying: Cheez-Its
Why are they so insanely satisfying? My theory is related to the heft of the cracker’s structure, which has a hearty snap. They are made with real cheese (although flour and vegetable oil appear first on the ingredient list), which over delivers on cheddar-y tanginess (note: the cheese variety is not specified), and they are not shy with the salt here. There’s a toasty richness to the flavor, like the grilled cheese cheddar that gets melted and beautifully golden-brown on the side of the pan.
The Best Crunch: Goldfish
Julius likes that “they are smiling,” and Simone likes “that they are fishies.” My husband loves that Goldfish blasted into space aboard the Space Shuttle Discovery in 1988. They’re made with real cheddar, which delivers on flavor; the label also lists smiles as an ingredient. The fish shape creates the perfect light crispiness, which yields to a just-airy-enough center. The Goldfish’s smallness is an added virtue. I can grab just a few while I’m assembling lunches for the day ahead, or I can make myself a bowl to keep reaching into while I write (10/10 recommend).
The Kid Pick: Annie’s Cheddar Bunnies
I thought these were decidedly less cheddar-forward than Goldfish, but my kids are happy with the pleasant mildness. Organic and made with real cheese and no artificial ingredients, you can feel virtuous as you devour these along with your kids. The mellow flavor is absolutely appealing in its brightness, and the bunnies have a great snap. Julius is convinced these are “the very best because…bunnies,” and who am I to argue?
The Best Vegan Version: Made Good Star Puffed Crackers
These tiny, puffy stars don’t contain any cheese, and they won’t fool you — they taste cheese-adjacent but not like cheese. They also don’t have any gluten; instead they’re made with a blend of oat and cassava flours. But they’re yummy, we all agreed. They have the buttery, salty taste of the best popcorn and a crispy lightness that won’t weigh you down. Bonus: The little stars are “cute and fun,” according to Simone.
PHOTO CREDIT:
Photography: Paul Quitoriano
Art Direction: Sarah Ceniceros Gomez
